Just like each person needs an individualized approach to alcohol addiction treatment, your approach to making amends in AA may look completely different from someone else’s. Working Step 9 is challenging and you’ll likely need support and assistance as you work through it. At Eudaimonia Recovery Homes, we provide personalized recovery support with comfortable sober living Austin, Houston, and Colorado Springs. We also provide regular drug and alcohol testing, professional peer recovery support programming, a three phase recovery program, volunteer placement services, and employment and educational support. Again, in recovery, your words may not mean as much to some people as you wish they would. Understandably, some people may just need more time to learn how to trust you again.

  • It makes it hard to remember things that happened before or after.
  • I don’t know how to deal with the regret, the Grief, and the guilt that I have because I love them so much and miss them just as badly.
  • An example would be telling someone how sorry you are that you stole from them and actually giving back what you took.
  • You may couple that making of amends with a request for forgiveness.
  • By now you have made it through the first 8 steps, congratulations, you have almost made it!

Making living amends does not undoing the wrongdoing, just as forgiveness doesn’t undo the wrongdoing. Instead, it is an action we take to compensate for what we have done. We go back to a moment in time and we fixate on the things we wish we had done differently. It makes it hard to remember things that happened before or after.

Promises to do things differently

You will need to demonstrate that you are committed to rebuilding https://ecosoberhouse.com/ and repairing your relationship with them. Making any type of amends can be challenging, but in this article, we’ll focus on living amends and tips for how to make them. If you or a loved one is struggling to stay sober or needs help maintaining sobriety while working the 12 Steps, Eudaimonia Recovery Homes can help. Call us or fill out our online contact form today to get started. However, these promises are usually the result of deep feelings of shame, guilt, and regret and may not be genuine for some.

indirect amends

This output is hugely expedient to need and straight one serving pass on be enough in return you to perceive completely protected from underline all day. Currently cbd products are my favorites because they in point of fact work. The harsh reality is that some of us really do burn down our bridges, and there is no going back. The person we wrong either wants nothing to do with us, or perhaps they are no longer alive to see the change that has taken place .


Making amends is a great intention that doesn’t always pay off with a positive experience. Some people may not be ready to accept your amends, forgive you, or move on. It can feel disappointing or frustrating to have your offer of reconciliation be rejected.

Why making amends is so important?

Making amends is part of the process of not only seeking forgiveness from others, letting them know how sorry we are, but also in working to forgive ourselves. Self-forgiveness is a crucial part of recovery. Without it, we are likely to fall into our same old patterns in order to cope with the pain.

No doubt you will experience challenges and setbacks along the way. But by prioritizing your recovery on a daily basis and doing whatever that next right thing might be for you, you will keep moving forward in living a life of good purpose. And I trust that He knows what my loved ones need to know or no longer have any need of knowing. I’ve asked for forgiveness from God and my loved ones .

What are some examples of living amends?

Soon, you’ll run out of reasons to give your loved ones why you’ve failed them once again. Apologies can only go so far in repairing past pain, but it’s a place where you need to begin to heal. Make a list of everyone you’ve made promises to that you didn’t fulfill, the people you’ve lied to, stolen from, or hurt in any way because of who you used to be, and apologize sincerely.


The goal of making amends is to right the wrong you did once upon a time. The wrong could have involved stealing, lying, causing damage to someone’s property, hurting someone, or something else. As “righting a wrong” can be subjective, part of your goal of making amends is to determine what will be needed to help the situation with each person. Making amends with family is an important part of the recovery process. In fact, two of the 12 Steps are specifically about making amends.